Thursday, June 9, 2011

Bachelorette Post-Mortem: Week 3

Again, uggh. I’ll say this…like my good friend Antoine Dodson says, “You are really dumb, for real.” If there was a group of people watching me, Kevin, Allison and Alex watch this episode and they were playing a drinking game for every time one of us said, “You are really dumb, for real”, they’d been as drunk as Cooter Brown.

I said it last week and I will say it again, I really hope they have Ashley on a suicide watch or at the very least, a good therapist. Hopefully, it isn’t the same therapist ole Brad Womack used. Guess what? Might not have worked.

I have no doubt that Ashley thought she felt something this Bentley character. It happens. If he never opened his mouth, I can’t say that I’d shake my fist at him, but then he did indeed open his mouth. What bothers me about it is that she was warned. Now we found out that her information came from last season’s crazy Michelle, but still. The two of them spent the better part of 2 months in close confined quarters. You have to think that some sort of relationship or confidence was formed. Based on that alone, one would think that information sticks with you in the back of your mind and you’ve got to think this guy might not be on the up-and-up.

Granted, crazy Michelle or not, if I had this information, I wouldn’t have let him into the house on the first night. After introducing himself, I would have directed him to a car I had waiting to the left. So we wouldn’t have even got to this point. But for the sake of S&Gs, let’s say if I had been in this situation, it would have gone quite differently. It wouldn’t have been an ugly cry that it was. It would have just been ugly.   

Winners

Nobody – Again, not one of those guys really pulled out of the pack, but then most of the episode was focused on the Bentley debacle.  

Bachelorette Music Coordinator – The organ music that accompanied the shots of Jeff in that dumb mask was genius. I hope that Jeff goes home and makes that his ringtone.

Losers

Bachelorette Date Coordinator - Whoever thought a roast would be a good idea for a group date needs one of two things:

1. A raise. With the train wreck that was that roast, the viewership for this episode was probably through the roof. Genius.

2. Fired on the spot. You’ve got to go for thinking that Ashley could handle anything those guys said. Dumb.

I don’t care if she had the thickest skin in the world, there’s no way Ashley was coming out of that night unscathed. Did any of them remember what happened last season? Ashley was voted Most Likely to be Insecure. Roast = Bad idea.

William – Oh yeah, again. In the Roast of Death, Silly Willy came out smelling like poo. Who does that? The best thing he said all night was “I’m an idiot!” Truer words were never spoken.

Line of the Night

First Place: “Introducing Zoro’s unemployed brother, Jeff Madola.” – Jeffery Ross, Roast Master of the Roast of Death

A close second: “You’ve had all of 15 minutes to talk to this girl and it’s like, “Boop. Here’s my face. You have small tits.” - Ben F.

Officially on the List

Bentley – It is confirmed. Please take your space next to Wes and Justin on the Bachelorette Media Whore List. At worst, you came across to America and beyond as an A #1 prize jerk. At best, you’ve just completed your casting tape for submission to the Bachelor Pad. I think you are a shoe-in.

The bad thing is Bentley and some people will blame it all on editing and submit that the producers spun his words. See that’s the thing, those were HIS words. He said those things. We all saw his lips moving in most of the clips where he spewed his verbal venom. You can’t argue with that. Context or not, it will forever be archived on tape. I hope his daughter never sees this show.

More Poor Choices

Not only did Ashley fall head over heels for Bentley, but in her stay-at-home date with J.P., she chose to forgo her contacts for her glasses. I know you had a horrible day and I’m all for getting comfy, but really?!? This is your first date with J.P.  Throw the guy a bone. You’re letting him see behind the curtain way too early. Lock it up.

Bachelor Game Standings

46 – Allison
38 – Kevin
38 – Vicki
37 – Alex

We all correctly guessed Ryan P. (Solar Panel) for the group date rose and got 8 of the 9 roses right. Allison and I got tripped up by Ames (The Catfish). Alex missed Constantine. It made him really mad when Ashley picked him first. Kevin missed Mickey. What was he thinking? So dumb.

1 comment:

  1. My problem with women, in particular, is that they seem to dwell on what they lost instead of looking at what they continue to have. Goodness, she hadn't known any of them that long and she gets that broken up over someone like that. And, why do they ALWAYS believe some guy over people that are suppose to be their friends. In fact, in other episodes, they don't believe ANYONE over the jerk.

    The roast, I believed, shown that she could not laugh at herself and should be a red flag to those guys that witnessed it. Her line about Bentley being the only one that came over to console her after the roast, should give a clue that she is gonna be the kind of woman that is needy. Guys beware!

    Love your commentary ... keep it up!

    ReplyDelete