25 Things about Me: #6

6. The first lie I remember telling was when I broke a window of the house playing tennis with a bouncy ball and trivets. I blamed it on my brother.

It went down like this:

I’m not quite sure how old we were, but it was between 1980 and 1985. This was when we lived in Vidalia, LA and it is the scene of this lie. My brother, Joe, is 4 years younger than me and like little brother at that age, he would do almost anything I asked of him.

On the day of the lie, we had just procured ourselves a Smurf super bouncy ball that was about the size of a tennis ball.

We only had one, so we had to play with it together. It was my genius idea to set up a tennis match inside of our den. The den was an enclosed garage. It was long and had only one window at the short end that looked out to the street. And in front of that window, was precisely where I setup Joe to receive my first serve. We used trivets for our racquets. They looked like this only, where the flowers are in the middle, on ours there was cork.

I can’t remember how many times we actually volleyed, but I’m going to assume it wasn’t for very long. I just remember hitting the ball with my trivet and the bouncy ball hitting the cork part. You don’t need to be a Mythbusters to know that cork and a super bouncy ball is not a good combination in a confined area. Thus, the super bouncy ball went right through the window. Being that my mother was in the back of the house and because there was no direct route to the den from where she was, I knew I had just enough time to change places with Joe. Guess what? I did.  I stood in front of the window proving that I couldn’t have hit the ball into the window, but that from where Joe was, he had the one to do it. It was a complete and total framing of the little brother and to my surprise, it worked.

It wasn’t until the middle of the night, rocked with guilt, that I entered my parent’s bedroom. I stood between their twin beds and told them that I had lied. That it was in fact, me that hit the Smurf super bouncy ball and broke the window.  

If you can’t already tell, I have a little bit of trouble with my memory, so I asked my Mother about this event. When I asked her if she remembered the incident, she said, “Well I most certainly do.” Then, I asked if she remembered what my punishment was, and she couldn’t either. She assumed that it was probably the usual routine: 3 licks on my hind end and sitting in my room for 3 days. I deserved it. Nice trick, Liar.

Here are the other revealed 25 things:

1. I was almost born in the vault at the Alabama State Capital.

2. I fear that my appendix will spontaneously burst and I will die.

3. I am allergic to plastic silverware.

4. I have an ungodly love of cake.

5. As a young girl, I thought that my dad was the actor who played Mike Brady on the Brady Bunch.